I’ve been doing this kind of writing for several years now. I’m not sure what you call this kind of writing. I’ve been on WordPress for a little over a year. WordPress shows you how many people read your blog. At its best, this blog is a modest one. Not very many people read the words I write. I’d like for more to read but I know this type of thing isn’t for everybody. In fact, June was the worst month for readership in the history of my labors to write something worthwhile.
I strive to encourage others but it appears that I sometimes am discouraged that no one is interested in my encouragement.
I have to be honest, every year, at least once, I am discouraged to the point that I feel I should start my day some other way, that no one will notice my blog falling into the pit of time wasted trying to do what I could not do.
I feel maybe I can do something more productive, more help to others or more rewarding.
But doing what I do, forces me to look at things in a bigger world than the one that just satisfies me. It pushes me into God’s world, into God’s word and God’s wonders that bless my life and I live almost as though I am nearly normal.
I’ve spent a lifetime feeling like a broken, malfunctioning outcast trying desperately to fit into something somewhere. I felt like I couldn’t be what God wanted me to be. My struggles were concealed and I carried the burden alone, trying to be good enough for God, sometimes giving up and at other times pushing forward by the power of my own will.
It was miserable.
So, even if no one reads these words today, I will continue on, pushing toward hope through the power of Jesus Christ and the promises he has made to me and the grace of his blood over me.
I’m still a bit discouraged. There’s no shame in that. The shame comes in giving up doing what is best. Living with a little discouragement is far better than living in shame. Discouragement is often the doorway to joy.